


An Epilogue Of Sorts

by TheFamousFireLadyM



Series: Something In Common [2]
Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Adoption, Domestic Fluff, Frottage, Gun Violence, Headcanon Backstory, Implied Mpreg, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Light Angst, M/M, Nick Is Not Cis, Sad Dad Time, Terrible Terrible Headcanons, Top Nick, Trans Character, shmoopy garbage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-27
Updated: 2017-01-11
Packaged: 2018-07-18 13:20:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7316827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFamousFireLadyM/pseuds/TheFamousFireLadyM
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Post-Something In Common<br/>Nick Valentine, armed with his trusty mercenary companion, tracks down a slavery ring being orchestrated right under their noses with the help of the Railroad.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I told myself I wouldn't write any more for this universe but guess what the siren call of sad sack kellogg has drawn me in once more.

Ellie dropped the kettle she was holding and it shattered at her feet. "Nick, what is  _ he _ doing here?" 

"I needed someone who could watch my back." He murmured, "I'm paying him well enough he wouldn't stab me in the back."

His fingers brushed Kellogg's palm and the mercenary squeezed his hand in response. It was enough to get him through the conversation, and was soon soothing Ellie’s worries. 

“He’s killed a lot of people, Nick, what  _ were you thinking?” _ She took him by the arm, and the detective gave her a guarded look, reading her like a book. 

“I know. I’m not afraid of him. He’s been more help than harm in solving these cases.” 

Even so, Ellie looked at him, horrified. “I can’t believe this.” 

He cast a quick look over his shoulder at Kellogg, and the merc gave him a tense smirk, crossing his arms over his chest like he’d been expecting this. “You don’t have to. I know you’re afraid for me. I know you’re worried, but you don’t have to be. If he were any harm, he would have done it already.” 

A small voice in the back of his mind replied that Kellogg  _ already had hurt him enough to last several lifetimes _ but he shook off that thought, and looked her dead in the eyes. “Ellie, you have to trust me.” 

“I do, Nick. I really do trust you. But sometimes I can’t help but think you’re not the best judge of what’s dangerous or not.” 

He pressed his lips together tightly, not willing to admit just how much that remark cut him to the quick. Nick wondered if Kellogg was just as offended as he was.

* * *

 

He found himself growing more used to waking up beside the old merc, and Kellogg sweeping an arm around him. The familiar warmth settling next to him, smelling like smoke and copper, no matter how many times he’d scrub his hands. Nick let out a sigh, head tilting down.  The mercenary twitched in his sleep, and he wondered if Kellogg dreamt about him.

A dreaming hand crept up his side, closing a clammy fist around the loose fabric of his shirt as it hung open. Nick showed some reluctance but ended up wrapping his arms around the mercenary, cheek nestled against the bare skin of his chest as he listened to the steady endless beating of his heart. Almost at once Kellogg tightened his grip, tugging him in closer. The merc didn't respond when Nick looked up at him, and he knew Kellogg was still fast asleep. A harmless notion came over him, and Nick lifted a hand to his cheek, before brushing their mouths together. Kellogg didn't respond, but the limbs at Nick's waist clenched their grip tighter. He groaned under his breath, and Nick took one look up at him, freezing in place. 

His brow furrowed, eyelids twitching with REM as he slept on, unaware. Nick's expression curled into something resembling fondness and lay his head down on the pillow beside him. 

He crooked his knee, and it came up between where Kellogg's legs were splayed. He pushed it upward, brushing between his thighs and Kellogg let out another sound. Nick raised an eyebrow and lifted his knee to get more comfortable, thick thigh pressing incessantly on his slowly burgeoning erection. Another groan escaped him and the merc took hold of his waist, desperately rocking his hips. Nick wasn't sure what he was dreaming about, but the mercenary was now riding his thigh. His lips parted and Nick could hear him talking in his sleep; "Oh,  _ god _ , baby, please let me come. I need you so bad." A low keening whine escaped the mercenary's mouth, and he was grinding down on Nick's thigh with renewed vigor, all the while his voice was a begging mewling mess. Nick could feel the wet spot where his cock tented out from his tight trousers, head pressing at the seam, as he begged and whined for the sweet friction. The power he held over the merc's aroused form was exhilarating, and Kellogg let out a cry as he came, baring his teeth in a sharp intake of breath before he crumbled at his touch, shakily letting out his breath. The detective let his hand slip lower, just at the edge of his belt. He could feel the merc still shaking, breath a hot point at his pulse. He huffed into the crook of Nick's neck, and coiled his arm around Nick's side, voice low and erotic. " _ I love you.. _ " 

Nick froze, looking at him for a moment that seemed to stretch for aeons. "What?" 

He didn't answer, eyes closed. Nick turned his head, kissing him deeply all at once. Kellogg's palm came up to cradle his jaw in his hand, mouth tenderly seeking Nick's. He relaxed and sagged against the bed halfway; he figured the mercenary thought he was still dreaming. Another shaky breath was let loose when he pulled back after what seemed like another eternity. His eyes opened slow, still half lidded when he came to the realization that he was sticky and sated and was not dreaming after all. Kellogg's eyes searched his surroundings before he stirred some more, jolting fully awake. He pushed up off the bed with an elbow, and realized who the weight beside him belonged to. With that thought he relaxed and loosed a breath that sounded like a sigh. "Don't flatter yourself with the idea I was dreaming about you." 

"No, of course not." The corner of Nick's mouth quirked up in a smirk, yet still an uneasy one. The mercenary instantly read his expression. 

"I thought I was... I..." He paused, gathering his thoughts. He knew Nick didn't want to hear it. Kellogg forced his gaze away, distant and cold. "Anything I said to you in my sleep isn't in any way close to true." 

He moved to fully pin Nick to the bed when the detective didn’t respond. The detective held his gaze with ease, mouth slack. His breathing started to pick up, chest heaving, before Kellogg pressed their mouths together again, an open hand resting just above his Adam's apple. Nick found an easy grip at his back, fingers finding familiar fit in their tracing of the muscles of his shoulders. It was only a moment he pulled away, and Nick chased his mouth with his own, catching the burning heat of Kellogg's mouth with his lips.

"Did you enjoy yourself teasing me?" 

"I could ask you the same thing." Kellogg's knee bumped the apex of his thighs, ever so carefully.  

An aroused grin crossed Kellogg's lips, and Nick felt hot all over. "Seems like someone's ready for round two." 

Nick hesitated and with it Kellogg's grin faltered. "You said you love me. Before you woke up."

The mercenary stopped in his tracks where he boxed Nick in with his arms, staring. "And?" 

"You don't really, do you? Not when it's someone like me?" Nick's brow furrowed, and Kellogg held his place.  

His gaze grew hard, and he looked away, expression distant. "No." 

Nick visibly relaxed, and he reeled the mercenary in so they were belly to belly, the skin on skin feeling overwhelming. Every one of his nerves buzzed with the sensation, Kellogg setting every one of his cells alight with pleasure. 

"I never said that." He hissed in pain and pleasure when Nick dragged his nails down the merc's back. "Not to  _ you _ , anyway." Nick crushed their mouths together and when the mercenary came up for air he muttered under his breath. "Those words were never meant for you." 

He settled back against the mattress, peering up at him, unsure if that was a good thing. Kellogg looked him up and down, before leaning in and giving him another gentle kiss, voice hoarse with longing. "You're a real piece of work, Nicky, getting all worried because I said something you weren't supposed to hear." 

Nick wasn't comforted by what he said, and his gaze fell. "Was I not supposed to hear it because it wasn't meant for me or because you didn't know I didn't want to hear it?" He lifted his gold gaze back to him. "Not from you, anyway. " 

"Mm, that's for me to know and for you to find out." 

He frowned deeply. The mercenary let his hand drop from Nick's throat, and it made its slow way down the line of his chest. Nick shivered, and his mouth fell open when Kellogg palmed his cock, rubbing slow. 

"You're hard just from this?"

He gave the detective a knowing look, before he leaned in, mouth brushing Nick's throat. 

"Is it just the idea? Or is it the meaning behind these words?” The mercenary smirked against his jugular. “ _ I love you. _ " A strangled moan escaped him along with a sudden buck of his hips toward the mercenary's weight, and the helpless look that crossed his face burned through Kellogg when he looked up at him. Nick's mouth was slack, breathing hard. 

"I can't believe this is what gets you off more than anything else." He let out a low chuckle and dragged the outside of a finger down his chest again, past the trembling muscles of his stomach. The merc wrapped a hand around his erection, giving him a slow stroke, and Nick's head rolled back along his shoulders. 

"Stop saying that if you don't mean it..." He admonished, breathing hard.

"C'mon..." He moved in closer as the detective languished before him, hips moving slow. "Don't you trust me?"

Nick gasped loudly and grabbed him by the shoulder.

He kicked out of his pants, cock standing stiff at attention against the hard muscles of his stomach. Nick lifted his leg and the merc grasped at his thigh hard enough to leave marks. He hissed through his teeth and Kellogg pressed in easily, hips cocked inward as he gave an experimental thrust, body trembling from the sensation alone as they ground against each other, bodies slick with sweat and precome. Nick let out a cry, nails biting into the soft flesh of his shoulders. The merc bowed his head, the press of his mouth on the juncture of Nick's throat too much for either of them to handle. 

Kellogg pushed the detective down onto his back and got astride his waist, knees locked just on either side of his body. "Siddown." He growled, reaching behind him for Nick's cock. The detective let out a unrestrained moan when his fingers stroked and tightened, bucking his hips.  

"Save it for when you're inside me, babe." Kellogg bit his lip, shifting a little to be more comfortable as he sank down onto Nick's erection. He huffed, a murmured obscenity falling from his lips as he rocked down once, glancing down at Nick's face as he held onto his shoulder with a rough hand.

The detective’s face was flushed and Kellogg gave him a feral grin, before starting to pump his ass downward against his cock. Nick's mouth fell open and he took hold of the merc, rocking his hips up fast to meet each bounce with a challenging thrust upward.

"Oh, fuck,  _ yes _ ," he breathed, voice low and dirty. "This is so much better than last time." 

He gripped the mercenary tighter and in one easy move, flipped him onto his back. Kellogg was surprised, and he was sure his expression showed it.

Nick was on top this time, looking down at the mercenary bracketed in between his arms. He gave him a breathless sort of cautious smile and let Kellogg lift his head to kiss him. The merc's hands came to rest at his hips, as Nick worked in between his legs. His arms coiled around Nick's shoulder and back, pulling Nick in until there was no space between them. The merc didn't give him much space to pull out, so Nick was pistoning his hips fast, never really getting too far away. A choked groan tumbled out of his mouth as Nick shoved his thighs apart, hips slamming between them. "Have you been practicing?" He teased, barely managing to get the words out. 

"Quiet." He groaned, hips moving faster. “Oh  _ goddamn _ , maybe I should do this more often.” 

“Sorry, didn’t think it took that much focus to fuck me.” He laughed, voice catching as he let out another gasped expletive. He tugged Nick in close. The detective looked him over, holding his gaze as Kellogg’s face twisted into a rictus of pleasure. He let out a shaky breath, pausing as the merc lost it entirely, watching as an orgasm overtook him. There was an ache in his chest as he leaned in, pressing his lips to Kellogg’s in a chaste kiss, before he rammed in hard, thighs trembling with the effort as he spilled out with a sharp cry. Nick collapsed against his chest, heart hammering somewhere in his throat. The mercenary lifted a hand and let it sweep down the sticky line of his spine. He lifted his head, catching a good glimpse of Kellogg giving him a quick grin, and he leaned in again, letting their mouths linger longer this time. He cupped Nick’s cheek in his hand, giving him a little curve of his lips upward. 

“You gonna get off me or are we just gonna sit like this for a while?” Kellogg asked, quietly, and Nick shifted to the side. He let out a soft breath and leaned up on his elbow next to him. 

“Thought that didn’t bother you?” Nick asked, as the merc turned to face him. 

“What, you layin’ on me?” Kellogg ran his fingers through the hair on the side of Nick’s head. He leaned into his touch, and sighed, eyes settling closed. “It doesn’t.” 

“Mm,” He responded with a monosyllabic answer, and Kellogg turned his head to press another sweet kiss to the side of his temple. He didn't look at him, and the merc lifted his chin. 

“What’s the matter now?” 

Nick cast a quick look at him, before giving his head a shake. “Nothing, I.. It’s nothing.” Kellogg frowned and sealed their mouths together in a lasting kiss. Nick took hold of his shoulder, squeezing tight as he tilted his head to the side. He pulled back, still clasping the mercenary’s shoulder. “You don’t mean it.” 

“Don’t mean what?” He gave him a challenging look, leaning in again. “That I don’t mind being this close?” 

Nick lifted his gaze and met it head on, before he let his eyes fall again. “No. You know what I mean.” 

“Do I?” Kellogg brushed a knuckle along his cheek. 

“You damn well do.” Nick shoved his hand away, and narrowed his eyes at him. “You don’t  _ love _ me, so stop acting like you do. I don’t want it anyway. I don’t want your damn heart; keep it to yourself.” 

“Who says I don’t?” 

Nick froze, searching his expression. “What?” 

“You heard me.” Kellogg’s voice was a hiss. “You fuckin’ heard me, Nick. You got my heart, you got everything.” 

His breath caught in his throat, sounding halfway through a sob. “I don’t want it. I told you I don’t want this.” 

“You had a chance to end this months ago. This was more than just us fucking, remember?” He reached out to touch his cheek, and Nick pushed his hand away in anger. 

“ _ Stop _ .” 

Kellogg stopped. He just totally froze, eyes slowly lifting to Nick. A shiver went down his spine, and he stared at the mercenary for a long moment. 

“You want me to stop? I can leave right now. All that shit we went through, all of that gone.” He gave him a shove, and pulled away. The merc didn’t look back as he pulled on his trousers, slipping into his armor. 

Nick shuffled to the end of the bed, legs hanging over the edge. “You’re not going to leave.” He stood up, taking a step toward him. “Even if you wanted to, there’s something stopping you.” 

“Yeah, you sure as hell got that right.” Kellogg paused in the doorway, shoulders squared. “You know what that something is?” 

Nick hesitated, but he took another step that brought him closer. He turned toward Nick, and the detective took a breath. He reached out to touch Nick’s face, and the detective’s eyes fluttered closed when his fingertips brushed against Nick’s jaw. “Me.” 

“You got it, babe.” He breathed, and reeled Nick in close, their mouths meeting. He exhaled, slow, shakily, as he lifted his hand to touch Kellogg’s face. “What’s stopping you from letting me leave?” 

He opened his mouth, but closed it again before he could speak. “Nothing. Nothing’s stopping me.” He let his hand drop. “I wish I could say there was something, but--” 

Kellogg took his hand in both of his, and Nick twitched, ready to jerk his hand away. “You need me just as much as I need you.” 

Nick’s shoulders sagged, and he knew the mercenary was right. “I... “ He hesitated, “Do you really?” 

“Yeah.” Kellogg let his hand drop, and Nick held his breath, worrying his lip between his teeth. “Yeah, I do. I’m not going to lie to you.” 

“No, because lying is beyond you, isn’t it?” Nick snapped, and Kellogg’s eyes narrowed, before he took a second to let out a breath. 

“About this? _ I’m not going to lie to you. _ ”  He repeated, moved in closer, an arm wrapping around his narrow waist. Nick gripped his wrist tight enough to hurt, and dragged his nails down the bare line of his forearm, leaving red marks. 

Nick bit his lip, and held his gaze, expression twisted into something Kellogg figured passed for hurt. 

He pressed the merc to the wall, and Kellogg tilted his head up to meet his gaze. “I don’t know if i want it to be the truth or not.” The mercenary laughed under his breath, and Nick didn’t glance down at him. “What’s so funny about that?” 

He chucked a finger under Nick’s chin, and the detective took a shaky breath. He could feel Nick’s erection stirring, his hips cocked at an angle toward him. “You can’t make up your damn mind, can you? I know you want me,” he murmured, reaching down and cupping his cock. “But are you willing to say it?” 

Nick’s breathing hitched and he let his eyes settle half closed, head falling back against his shoulder. “What do you want me to say? That I love you, that-that I’ve been in love with you this whole time?” 

“Tell me the truth.” His fingers slipped up the indented plane of his hip, thumb smoothing along the narrow jut of his hipbone. “Tell me everything.” 

Nick’s eyes snapped open, and he grabbed hold of Kellogg’s face in both of his hands, crashing their mouths together. The kiss was rough, teeth snapping down on the merc’s lower lip, eager and searching and aggressive. Kellogg pressed a tender touch to the base of his spine as Nick devoured every inch of his mouth, tongue scraping his teeth, brushing against his own tongue. The detective let out a lustful moan as he drew back, breathing hard, before looking up at him. “You’re the only damn person willing to put up with me anymore.” 

“That doesn’t sound like something I didn’t know.” Kellogg gave him a teasing grin as he leaned their foreheads together. Nick didn’t meet his gaze, his fingertips resting on the very edge of the mercenary’s face. . 

“If I didn’t love you, I would have let you leave.” 

“Oh?” Kellogg whispered, lips at his ear. “Is that a confession?” 

“As close as you’re gonna get.” 

He gave him a broad grin. “Is that a challenge?” 

“I’d like to see you try to get me to say it more explicitly.” Nick answered, and pulled their faces together again. “Think you’re up for that kind of job?” 

“I think I can pull that off.” He dropped to his knees with ease, in one swift liquid movement, and Nick’s face flushed as he watched him. “You’ll be begging in a minute.” 

“Oh really?” Nick let out a groan under his breath. “Can you get me to say it?”   
  


* * *

  
  


"Recognize me?" Kellogg's voice was low, a real threat. The man caught handcuffed on his knees sounded desperate. "Yeah, you're that mercenary from up Diamond City. Heard you kill whole families without blinking." 

"Got that right." He leaned in, catching a rough hand on his shoulder, mouth just by his ear. "You know why you're here?" 

"Fuck you." He was wriggling in his bonds.

"Wrong answer." He pistol whipped the man with the handle of his gun, and somewhere behind him Nick was getting off to this. "Where's the girl, Terry?"

The man spit out blood, and he cracked a wild grin. "You'll be lucky if you find her body before some ferals do." 

"I should kill you right now." He cocked the gun, raising it to the man's forehead. 

He swallowed hard, and he stammered out a response: "Okay, shit, don't shoot me. She's in the old Corvega plant. Better hurry, hear it's full of ghouls." 

Kellogg muttered, "You better not be lying or I'll put a bullet in your skull if we find out she's not there." 

"She's there, I swear! Had to find a safe place to hole her up in til her buyer came in from out of town to pick her up." 

His expression hardened, mouth curled into a snarl. "You fucking piece of shit. No. You know what. You're worth less than that." He lifted the gun again, pressing the barrel to the man's temple. He lifted his gaze to Nick for a second, and he tilted his head to the side, seeing what the mercenary would do.

"You promised you wouldn't shoot me!" He was struggling to get free, or at least back up away from the gun. 

"Yeah , well, I lied. See you in hell, asshole." He pulled the trigger and blood splattered his face. Nick let out a breath he didn't know he was holding as the man slumped to the ground, head little more than just a fleshy crater. The detective approached him, and he could tell Kellogg was shaking. He reached out, a hand coming up to rest on his unarmored shoulder. The merc started, then relaxed. "When that dirty fuck comes to get her, I'm killing him too." 

His hand fell, lowering. "She's not your daughter." 

His gaze shot up at the detective, red hot with fury. "I know that.” He swallowed, wiping at his face with an absent hand and pulling his palm away bloody. His voice was harsh, coarse with some painful emotion.  "One less bastard like that in the world’ll let some other little girls grow up safe. I'd say that's a good thing." 

"There'll be other little girls. Ones we can't save." 

"I know." He was reloading his gun, not meeting his gaze. "Let's get this one safe then."

* * *

 

"Hey, what's your name?" Nick had crouched so he was eye to eye with the child. Her white blonde hair was matted in places with filth, and she didn't answer. He guessed she was in shock. He offered her a bottle of water, cracking the seal open so she could guzzle it greedily. "Easy, it's okay. We're not going to hurt you. Can you come with us?" 

She looked up at them with big blue eyes, and the merc froze in place. "Where's my mommy and daddy?" 

Nick pressed his mouth into a grim line, not willing to tell her the truth. 

"We're going to take you to them. Is that alright?" 

She nodded and Nick took her hand. Her fingers were easily dwarfed by his own.

They were almost to Diamond City when the girl grew tired of walking. He lifted her into his arms, and the child rested her head against his shoulder as they walked. She was mumbling sleepily to him as they walked; Kellogg could hear the low sound of his voice answering with  _ Mhm _ s and  _ Oh, I see _ at her inaudible questions. He scanned the horizon for any threats, and there was nothing. No raiders, no gunners. Nothing. It was too silent and it left him feeling uneasy when they got within Diamond City's limits. 

The girl had fallen asleep. Nick peeled off his coat and wrapped her in it. 

"I can carry her if your arms are getting tired." Kellogg offered, voice quiet. Nick hesitated, but placed her gently in his arms. He scooped her close, and she stiffened in his arms for a moment, before going slack. She was fascinated by his armor, tapping it with her fingers to make a sound. Her head was nestled just under his chin, and half a breathless smile was glimpsed for just a second. 

"Do people think you're scary?" A quiet voice called from in his arms. He glanced down, and the little girl was gripping the harness securing his armor like a lifeline. "Mr. Terry told me people wear this stuff so people think they're scary." 

"Did... Mr. Terry..." He felt sick calling the dead slaver that. "Ever hurt you?" 

She went quiet and he could feel her trembling in his arms. "Sometimes. When I was bad." 

"Hey, it's okay." He swallowed around the lump that rose in his throat. "He's never going to hurt you again." 

Nick heard him murmur and glanced over his shoulder at him. Kellogg felt eyes on him and looked up, meeting his gold gaze for just a moment, an unguarded look fleeting, before his eyes fell back to the child. "I look scary so I can protect people." He looked up to see if Nick was listening, but he had turned back around. 

"Are you gonna protect me?" 

The merc didn't answer for a moment, then looked at her seriously. "I'm going to protect you as long as you're with us." 

That seemed to satisfy her and she settled down against his chest and fell back asleep. 

"Do you honestly think we can find someone to take care of her?" Nick spoke at once, quietly.

"We don't find anybody, I'll make sure she stays cared for." 

He let out a slow exhale, and stopped walking. "Do you think you should do that?" 

"I won't hurt her."  _ Not like you _ , the words fell unspoken between them.

"Her name is Alana, and she doesn't know where she's from. Somewhere far I think. She described seeing Rivet City on their way here. Ever been there?" 

Kellogg sighed, a tired anger making itself known. "Good luck finding her parents."

It was a long and quiet walk back to Diamond City. Nick didn't want to spoil the sight of the child sleeping solemnly in the mercenary's grip. 

* * *

 

He glanced to the child asleep on the bed in the corner, still wrapped in Nick's coat. "Do you still think we'll find her parents? What kind of people sell their child into slavery?" 

"Desperate people." He sighed, chin resting on his hand. "I doubt we'll get them to reveal themselves, and they won't come looking for her if they already got paid." 

The mercenary grit his teeth. "I wouldn't let them take her back anyway." 

He looked up at him, surprised. 

"You know as well as I do whoever was going to buy her did not have anything nice planned for her." He spat, and Nick frowned. 

"I know."

"She'll be better off here." 

"With some old grizzled mercenary and someone like me?" Nick turned to look at him. 

The accusation stung and Kellogg frowned. "Better here than with someone who wants to hurt her." 

"You are taking this too personally." Nick spoke after some consideration. "She's got a family that will appreciate her out there somewhere."

"And if she doesn't?" 

Nick took a deep breath and released it. "We'll think about that when we get to it." 

Kellogg didn't look at him. "Until then she stays with me." 

Nick studied his expression, noting the determined look and knew he wouldn't get him to change his mind.

The mercenary was smoothing the child's hair back, fingertips brushing over her forehead. Nick paused in the doorway, hands on either side of the frame. 

"She trusts you. More than I can say...." He paused, sighing. 

"Finish what you were saying." He growled, voice low.

"More than I could say for myself." He looked down, taking a step back. 

Kellogg frowned, and turned to face him, slipping lithely to his feet. "Do you still feel that way?" 

Nick didn't answer. The merc rounded on him, a hand coming up to rest beside him on the door. He leaned in, mouth up next to his ear. "If you didn't trust me you wouldn't let me in this close." 

Nick touched his chest with his fingertips, holding him in place. Kellogg lifted his chin and Nick's gaze slowly dragged across his face. 

"I'm not afraid of you." 

"That isn't the same thing as trusting me." 

"Do you want me to trust you more than I do?" Nick took another step back and the mercenary had him pinned to the door frame, an arm just at his side, bracketing him in. 

"Takes a lot of guts to turn your back on me. Maybe you were stupid to trust me." 

Nick leaned back, chest heaving. "We're not doing this same old song and dance in front of  _ her _ ." 

"Whoever said it was the same." Kellogg murmured, knuckles brushing up along his cheek. The detective didn't look at him, gaze distant.

He let out a shaky breath and Kellogg took a chance, surging forward in an instant. Nick took his jacket in hand, tugging him in closer. The mercenary held him fast, hand cupping his cheek. He rested his head forward against the mercenary's forehead. He breathed for a moment, staying still just like that. Their mouths met again, this time Nick taking the lead. He drew back after a moment, breath coming in hard. His gaze flew to the mercenary's expression, and he paused, mouth open about to speak. "It's not a matter of trust."

"We're not dragging her into this." He responded, sounding far too sincere, and Nick's gaze shot up to meet his eyes. 

"That's the most responsible thing I've ever heard you say." 

He cracked a half grin, and let his gaze lower, becoming distant. "She's asleep, Nick." He felt him shiver at the sound of his name, bodies pressed so close. "I'm not asking to fuck you, I'm not that much of an idiot." His smile softened, and he kissed him again.

"Does that bother you?" Nick asked, after a long moment of deliberation. 

"Not being able to fuck you while she's around?" The merc's brow wrinkled. "Is it supposed to?" 

He fell quiet again, and Kellogg lifted his face with a gentle palm. "Does it bug  _ you _ ?" 

He didn't speak and Kellogg knew the answer. 

"Look, you want me. I know, I got it, I got the concept. That's what we had here, and it's all thrown off course."

"It’s not all we had." Nick settled back against the wall, hand resting on the corner of his elbow. 

"Name one other thing." Kellogg added, moving in close. 

Nick opened his mouth to speak, and then fell quiet. "You've been working with me on this case." 

"That doesn't count." Kellogg pulled back, leaving him stranded against the wall. 

"What do you want me to say, that I admit we only fight and  _ sleep together _ ? Or maybe you're trying to get me to do something else with you."

He scoffed and Nick was sure it was meant to be a laugh, and the detective fixed him with a searching look. "Are you asking me on a date?" 

Kellogg looked him over, expression guarded. "No way, pal. Where would I even take you?"

He paused, tilting his head back. "Goodneighbor, maybe, if you're afraid of being recognized. 

"The Third Rail isn't completely shit." Kellogg conceded, chin cocked to the side.

Nick let out a surprised laugh, and the mercenary pressed in closer. He wrapped his arms around Kellogg’s neck and let him take control as their mouths met. 

"Look at us, we're turning into some kind of family." 

"Mm," Nick answered, brushing their mouths together again. "Something like that. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> time for me to die i still can't believe im writing this lmfao

“If you wanted to kiss me so bad, you could have just asked.”

“Oh, and ruin the surprise?” He asked with a cock of his eyebrow. Nick lifted his head and their mouths met easily. The mercenary’s fingers curled around his collar, and he pulled him in with a deliberate tug. His own fingers cascaded up the side of Kellogg’s neck, catching somewhere just under the back of his head. Nick’s mouth fell open when his arm pressed to the detective’s back, palm side down just under his coat. The merc’s fingers closed around his side, and Nick cast a quick look down at their feet, noting the way Kellogg was standing. He worked a knee between Nick's thighs, and the detective leaned back against the wall. 

“Well, shit, I never thought I'd say anything like this but I honestly could get used to this.” 

“Mmhm. Ain't that what I said?” Kellogg pressed in closer, and the detective's fingers caught just under his rough face, mouths fitting together easily. 

“Sure, sure..” He mumbled, distracted by the overwhelming heat of him shoved so close. 

He surveyed Nick's expression for a moment before chucking his fingers under his chin and lifting his face. “Hm.” 

“What?” Nick took hold of his wrist. “You like staring at me so much, you should take a picture.” 

He chuckled dryly under his breath and shook his head. “And get chewed out for wasting my film on some old-timey detective, all gray haired and angry.” 

Nick frowned, knowing he was making fun of him. 

“I like it.” Kellogg's voice was softer, threading fingers through his hair. He paused and was curling a strand around his finger, running his thumb along the dark piece of hair. 

“Of course you do.” He spit, face feeling hot at his closeness. Kellogg's jaw tensed for a second. “You  _ love _ me, don't you?” 

“Do you feel the same way about me?” 

“Can't say I do, can't say I don't.” 

Kellogg scoffed, forcing his gaze away. “That's a coward's answer. Didn't take you for one of those.” 

Nick fell quiet, unable to bring himself to look up. “What do you want me to say?” 

“You know what I wanna hear.” 

“Doesn't mean I'll say it if it's not the truth.” 

“Who is to say it's not the truth?” Kellogg pressed the question, “You can't lie to yourself more than you lie to me.” 

Nick held his tongue, before sighing. “I hate to break this up but we need to be going. Ellie managed to get in contact with next of kin for the girl. We’re meeting them when they get into town.” 

Kellogg scoffed. “How do you know they won't sell her off again?” 

“Ellie's a better judge of character than I am.” Nick answered, extricating himself from Kellogg's grip with some difficulty. 

“So the answer is no.” Kellogg's hands dropped from his sides. 

“One of Dr. Amari’s contacts found her family, from what I understand.” 

“Even better.” Kellogg muttered, rolling his eyes.

As far as looks went, the woman that called herself the girl's aunt didn't seem to be anything close to a raider. Nick guessed that meant she passed whatever inspection Kellogg was holding. 

“She's safe with them.” Nick called quietly, noting the way he was staring into the middle distance. “She’ll be happy too.” 

Kellogg shifted on his feet, not paying him any mind. It was as if he weren't even listening up until Kellogg opened his mouth to speak; “Better here than with us, huh?” 

Nick turned to look at him, confusion growing. “I thought you wanted to keep her.”

He opened his mouth to speak but let it close again without uttering a word before sighing. “You proved your point. She'd be better off with a family instead of two old bastards like us.” 

Nick crossed the small space between them, the worn palm of his hand coming up to touch the edge of the merc's jaw. Kellogg didn't react besides the way his eyelids fluttered closed. “If you're trying to tell me you're sorry, don't waste your breath.” 

Nick let his hand drop. “I wasn't going to.” 

“Another lie, Nicky?” His gaze found Nick's and the detective froze for a moment before Kellogg touched his face with his own hand. “There's nothing for you to apologize for. Everything was done by the books, and we all got our happy ending.” 

“You owe me a date.” Nick spoke after some deliberation. 

“Oh, do I?” The corner of Kellogg's mouth twitched up like a smirk, and the detective struggled to keep a straight face in response. “The Third Rail was your suggestion, wasn't it?” 

“It was  _ yours _ .” Nick pressed his lips together, trying hard not to smile. It still showed in how the corners of his eyes crinkled, and Kellogg had no problem in figuring that out. 

“You say that like its a bad thing.” 

“Might be. The jury’s still out on that one.” 

“Mmhm.” Kellogg quietly agreed. “Afraid somebody might jump you out here?” 

“With you around? I doubt it.” 

Kellogg laughed and Nick ducked his head, his laugh infectious. 

“I thought you'd notice, Val, but I guess some things slip your mind.” 

“Notice what?” 

“Alana was a synth, wasn't she?” 

“No. Not a chance.”

“You can't be serious. The woman that picked her up stunk of the Railroad. Your doctor friend is part of that stupid organization. Don't play dumb.” 

“Ellie wouldn't have organized a pick up in the middle of the city.” 

“She would when she's fucking an agent. I'm telling you the girl was a synth. You got me to be an accomplice to your little synth rescue operation. I can't fucking believe the  _ balls  _ on your friend.” He laughed again, covering his eyes as he fell back against the wall. “Does she  _ know who I am _ ?” 

“You're not on the Institute’s payroll any more. That's the one thing that kept you hunting down strays.” Nick added, watching his expression. 

“They have coursers for synth retention,  _ I  _ never got my hands dirty with runaways like that.” He was still chuckling, the last vestiges of his laughter eking out from behind his hands.

“Of course not.” Nick leaned his hip against the wall. “You just pull off dangerous baby heists.” 

He scoffed, scrubbing at his face with the heel of his hand. “Humans are easy to deal with. They're easier to destroy.” 

“Funny.” Nick didn't bother looking back at him. “You think they might send someone after her?” 

“I don’t think so. What kind of pervert builds a little girl and then sells her to the highest bidder?” 

“Is that what you think happened?” 

“What I think happened was this --” Kellogg took a steady breath and looked Nick full in the face. “Somebody made her, I don’t know why, but I don’t like any of the reasons I could come up with, and she somehow managed to get onto the surface, with memories of a family selling her to some slaver. Whether that was because whoever made her wanted it to happen or not, I can’t fathom a reason why, but…” His voice trailed off, and he looked to be in deep thought. “I could be wrong though. None of the reasons fit. Why would someone set this up?” 

Nick worried his lip, gold gaze alighting across Kellogg’s tense expression. “You find it suspicious.” 

“You don’t?” Kellogg turned to look at him. Nick didn’t want to admit thinking about it left a queasy feeling in the pit of his stomach. 

“I think a drink or two might help.” 

“I think more than just two.” 

* * *

 

“It still bothers you, doesn't it?” Nick lifted the glass to his lips, regarding him over the rim of it. “That some stranger took her in, a stranger that might be part of the group that your  _ former employer _ is desperate to stop?”

Kellogg swallowed hard, and set down his shot glass. “Sounds like it's bugging  _ you.” _

Nick closed his mouth, working his lips. “I won't deny it might stick with me a little while, but you saw it yourself. She’s gonna be alright.” 

“Yeah.” He tapped his dull nails on the table. “Still I'm not convinced.” 

“What’ll it take for you to accept it?” He regarded the merc coolly, watching Kellogg's grip on the table’s edge tighten. 

“I don't know.” 

“Listen. Around this time next year we’ll go see her again. A quick little check-up to ease your mind.” 

His mouth twisted but remained silent. Nick knew what he was thinking: That wouldn’t be possible if she were a synth. 

“You don't have to agree. It wasn't a question.” Nick turned his gaze back to his drink. “If I, if  _ we _ didn't do this, check up on her now and again, I don't know if I could let myself get away with it.” 

“So your own damn guilty conscience rules again.” 

“You're not fooling anyone with that.” Nick added wearily. “You have as much a  _ guilty conscience  _ as I do.” 

Kellogg looked at him for a moment before letting out a tight lipped sigh. “It's what makes people like us stick together.” 

“I'd blame something else for us, but you're entitled to your opinion.” Charlie topped off Nick's drink and he tipped it to his lips deliberately. 

“Are you drinking to celebrate or to  _ forget? _ ” 

That got him to pause and put his drink down. “Its not forgetting if it’s just for tonight.” 

“And just for tonight turns into every night.” Kellogg added in a pointed tone. “I would know, I lived it.” 

Nick gave a dismissive sound and downed his drink. 

Kellogg looked him over above the rim of his glass. “Easy on the drinking, pal. I'm not lugging your drunk ass home.”

“ _ Pal _ .” Nick mused, setting the cup down harder than necessary. “There's always the Hotel across the street if it comes down to it.” 

“Do you know how  _ that _ would look?” Kellogg leaned in conspiratorially. “I can see it now. Your lady friend will get a nice message from the doc telling her all about how the big bad Institute mercenary took advantage of poor Nick Valentine, too drunk to stand on his own.” 

“She wouldn't.” Nick knew he was joking. “It isn't as if she didn't figure out our intentions tonight.” 

“What did she do? Send you out with a slap on the ass sayin’, “Go get ‘em”?” His elbow leaned against the table, a wicked grin cutting across Kellogg's lips. 

“No. It's just, Ellie’s still an  _ adult _ . She can guess what’ll happen.” 

“Of course.” Kellogg answered with a smirk. “Is that a suggestion or an order?” 

Nick glanced to his drink, and wet his lips with the tip of his tongue. “Wouldn't you like to know?” 

The merc didn't bother with a response, instead just shaking his head with a scoff. 

“Finish your drink.” Nick nodded toward his glass, “We have a case to handle.” 

“Isn't it a little dangerous taking something on when you're barely sober?” 

“I'll live.” 

 

* * *

  
  


“What was the case?” Kellogg asked as soon as Nick had the door locked, and he leaned his back against it. 

“Getting back an owed favor.” Nick was drawing his coat off his shoulders, setting it across the edge of the bed. “Told the hostess there'd be a stakeout here.” 

“Did you  _ lie? _ ” Kellogg laughed, incredulous.

“No. There  _ is _ something to be seen, but the courier isn't supposed to be in until tomorrow morning.” 

“A little fib then.” Kellogg cocked his hip against the footboard of the bed. 

“Won't hurt anybody.” Nick sank down onto the mattress. 

“I'm shocked.” Kellogg took gentle hold of Nick's thighs, parting them easily and working in between them. The detective leaned back, hands spread behind him on the bed. “Appalled really. The goody two shoes detective telling a little bitty lie to get some privacy.” He gave Nick a breathless grin and crushed Nick's mouth to his own. 

He rose up toward Kellogg, knees hooking around his legs. “The walls are still too thin for my liking here.” 

“Since when do you care if other people hear you.” 

His face colored. “Since always. I hate knowing people know about us.” 

“A little late for that.” He teased, letting Nick pull him down on top of him. Kellogg's mouth traced just under his chin, and he dragged his fingers along the merc's back. Kellogg worked a hand under the waistband of his belt, tearing his shirt out from being tucked in. 

Nick lifted his face, their mouths fitting together. His fingertips scored through the sloppy shorn hair that covered the side of Kellogg's face. “Was this your plan to get my guard down with sweet talk and kisses?” 

He gave him a little pinch, running his rough fingers along the smooth line of Nick's hip. Nick jerked, but didn't make a sound. Kellogg grabbed hold of his trousers, easing them down one inch at a time. 

Nick arched his hips, letting him drag his trousers off. 

“Is it working?” 

“Give me a few minutes to decide.” 

Kellogg laughed and mouthed down his chest, passing down closer to his cock. Nick sank his teeth into his lip, as he bit back a groan.

“Maybe I can persuade you a little more.” 

“You can try.” 

“You just want me to  _ try _ , don't you?” His hot breath passed over Nick's erection, and his thighs tensed when Kellogg's fingers followed. “How's this for persuasion.” 

“I think I'd prefer it if you had your mouth full.” 

“Vulgar words, Nick.” Kellogg squeezed his cock and the response Nick let out was pitiful. 

“It's a little difficult making a witty response when your hands are on me.” 

“Sounds like a challenge.” Kellogg gave him a wicked grin and took him into his mouth. Nick let out a groan that seemed to come from deep in his chest. The merc’s eyes narrowed, and he squeezed Nick’s hips hard enough to send Nick gasping, clawing at his shoulders. There was a throaty little laugh that he let out, before Nick gave him a withered little glare. His leg hooked at the crux of Kellogg’s neck, dragging him closer. Kellogg cast a quick glance up the length of his body, and Nick couldn’t help but shiver when their eyes met. 

“What are you getting at here?” Nick’s head fell against the pillow and he could barely manage to get the words out. 

“You tell me. That is, if you can even say anything.” Kellogg smoothed his palm along the flushed head of his cock, squeezing and rolling his hand over the heated flesh. 

“ _ Damn it _ ,” Nick breathed, covering his mouth and letting out a sharp sound. 

* * *

 

Nick was flushed, breathless and sated. He glanced toward the mercenary, whose shoulder he had nestled his cheek against. Kellogg let out a huff, knuckles scraping slow down his cheek. “Times like this you remind me of somebody I used to know.” 

“You keep saying that. But who?” 

“Just an old friend from the Institute. You wouldn't know him.” 

“Of course.” Nick let his gaze slide away from Kellogg's, voice failing him. “What was his name?” 

“Pendleton, I think.” 

Nick closed his eyes, wearily. “Like Nora.” 

“Yeah. Some coincidence, right?” Kellogg lied through his teeth. “Had dark hair like yours,” he ran his fingers through the wispy pieces of hair along Nick's sideburns. “From what I remember, felt like this too. Had green eyes though.” 

“I'm flattered.” He deadpanned, feeling Kellogg's fingers drop from his hair. “Must have been someone special.” 

Kellogg let out a dismissive sound through his teeth, chest clenching a little. “About as special as anyone else in the Institute.” 

“That is to say, not at all?” Nick ventured quietly, noting his reaction. 

“Not at all.” Kellogg echoed, gaze following the line of Nick's expression. “Just made me think of it when I looked at you.” 

Nick gave a monosyllabic noncommittal sound in response. “Maybe it was someone descended from the real Nick.” 

“Thought your girl died before you got the chance to have any kids with her.” 

“She did.” Nick responded, feeling hollow. “But it wouldn't have mattered anyway. Things have a funny way of turning out how you never could have planned.” 

Kellogg's brow furrowed. “Lemme guess, there was someone else.”

He let out a shaky sound. “No.” 

The merc stopped, taking a good look at Nick's eyes. “You don't have to tell me.” 

“I might as well. Even if it was a long long time ago, I can still remember it, as if it were only a day ago, as if it happened to  _ me _ and not the original Nick.” He let out a sigh, and covered his face with his hands. “I had a son. I don't know what happened to him once the bombs dropped, but last I heard he was adopted by some well to do couple only a few hours after he was born.” 

“Fancy.” Kellogg remarked, and Nick gave him a look before continuing.

“That's my biggest secret. And you know more than really anyone else.” 

“Should I thank you for trusting me?” Kellogg smoothed his fingertips along the back of Nick's hand.

“That depends on whether or not you won't judge me for letting someone else have the baby.” 

“Do I look like the kind of person that would do that?” 

Nick fell silent. “I'm sure it's all in my file anyway.” 

Kellogg fell quiet as well. He knew there was something else he wasn't telling him, the same way he wasn't going to tell Nick it had been the current acting director of the institute he'd been fucking. 

Nick knew Kellogg was hiding something, but he knew if he pried, Kellogg would end up hearing more than he bargained for too.

He let out a sigh, and murmured: “Just what someone like me deserved. The woman I loved was dead and the man who killed her had me metaphorically backed into a corner after physically backing me into that same corner.” 

Kellogg settled against him, listening. “He hurt you, didn't he?” 

Nick flinched: “ _ Yes _ . The kind of hurt that lasts and lasts long after everything ended.” 

“You don't want my apology.” Kellogg let Nick turn away from him, arms drawn up close to his chest. “I'm not going to bother to offer it when you'll just turn it down.” He wrapped his arms around Nick's chest, pulling his back against his own chest. “You didn't deserve it, what happened to you.” He spoke right in Nick's ear, and he let out a full body tremble. 

“What that son of a bitch Winter did to you was something I would have shot him for.”

Nick's expression twisted but he let out a grim laugh anyway. “You might get your chance if we come across him.” He knew now, that Kellogg knew it all. Kellogg had read his medical records. It was a cold feeling that settled in his chest at the knowledge the mercenary knew everything there was to know about him. 

“I'll let you get your revenge some other time.” Kellogg answered, pushing out of his mind the thought that perhaps Nick should know what things his only child had accomplished. 

“Thank you.” He muttered, covering Kellogg's arms with his own. “I don't think Ellie even knows about this. I don't want her to know.” 

“I won't tell her.” Kellogg pressed his mouth to Nick's shoulder. “Did you ever find out the name of the people that ended up caring for your kid?” 

“I'm sure they died years ago.” Nick responded. 

“Well, you're half right.” Kellogg muttered to himself and Nick fixed him with a confused look, sure he heard him wrong. “Some coincidence.” He added in a quiet voice. “Maybe that's why I fell for you so easily.” 

“Are you telling me this because you're drunk or because you have someone to listen?” Nick lay his head on Kellogg's shoulder. 

“I could ask you the same thing. Did you just wait for years until someone was out there who would listen to you talk about this?” 

Nick didn’t speak. He just let his grip tighten on the frayed edge of the mattress. “I'm drunk enough not to care about the consequences.” 

“Fair enough.” Kellogg responded, fingers curling and uncurling around Nick's wrists. “What do you think the  _ consequences  _ would be for telling me?” 

Nick fell silent, turning his head into the pillow. 

“Okay. You don't have to tell me anything else.” Kellogg conceded, listening to him breathe. “I shouldn't have said anything.” 

Nick didn't respond, and Kellogg was sure he was faking sleep. 

“For what it's worth, I  _ am _ sorry.” 

“Your apology isn’t worth a damn thing.” Nick muttered, words muffled. “Never will be.” 

“Didn’t think it  _ was _ .” Kellogg sank his teeth into his bottom lip, letting Nick’s words wash over him.

“Doesn’t make me feel any better.” 

The merc’s words failed him, and he conceded the point with a bow of his head. “Nothing I say will help.” 

“Then don’t…” Nick answered, voice trailing off. 

“Get some rest. You'll feel better tomorrow.” 

Nick didn't answer. An uneasy silence fell between them.

* * *

 

When Nick opened his door the next morning, his office was silent. Ellie wasn't home, which meant maybe he had just missed her by moments since it was barely after dawn. He guessed she was in Goodneighbor again. But something still nagged at his thoughts when he took another step into the building. A sick dread welled up in his chest and he knew then something was wrong. 

His room was trashed. The office was ransacked, papers thrown about everywhere. Nick took a step into the doorway, brow furrowed. “ _What--_ ” 

"Nick." He swiveled. He knew that voice. Nora looked different, cleaner. The institute issued clothes were the only neat thing in the room. "Sigma Upsilon 10-27-49." The last thing he noticed before he blacked out was the look on her face. She looked guilty, expression giving away her true feelings no matter how she tried to hide it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well and that's that. setting up for my next big project is tough lmfao

**Author's Note:**

> also forgive me it's really uh all over the place lmfao


End file.
